You\u2019ve probably seen their white and yellow vans driving around Manhattan following a metahuman \u2018incident.\u2019 That\u2019s the industry\u2019s polite term for when metahumans get involved in something messy. Roadkill Inc. isn\u2019t a name that inspires confidence, Donna Bartlet will be the first to admit with a broad grin, but nobody can deny the fact that her company is at the top of a field she pioneered. If you ask around, however, most people couldn\u2019t give you a straight answer as to who they are, why they\u2019re there, and what they do. So, to answer all those questions, we decided to talk to Donna Bartlet herself and get the lowdown on Roadkill Inc., one of the most unusual and controversial meta-related enterprises out there.<\/p>\n
HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Donna, tell us about Roadkill Inc.<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Well, we\u2019re a private hazmat team. When metas fight or save lives, you have a lot of what we call \u2018residuals\u2019 left behind. Radiation, toxic blood, resistant skin samples, indestructible hair, strange materials, exotic particles\u2026 all of that. We clean it up before some trophy seeker picks up something dangerous or someone\u2019s pet eats it.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Isn\u2019t that sort of thing supposed to be handled by the Environmental Protection Agency?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>It depends on the mess. There\u2019s a lot of inter-Federal handshaking, so the EPA might coordinate with the Department of Energy or the CDC or USAMRIID, but they mostly jump in when it affects a whole town or city or lands on Federal property. The rest of it falls under local government\u2014the municipality or the state. That\u2019s when we come in.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>With the EPA\u2019s approval?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>That\u2019s right. We are a privately owned business, but the EPA vets us, they perform surprise inspections of our equipment, our facilities, you name it. We pass them with flying colors, naturally, but they keep us on our toes. We decontaminate places so that work crews can go in to rebuild damaged property. It might be the city, or insurance companies, or corporations, but we can move faster than any municipal or Federal agency, I\u2019ll tell you.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT:<\/strong> But your company\u2019s come under fire. You\u2019ve been accused of theft of–<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Theft\u2019s a really grand word here and I\u2019ve heard it so often, I’ve learned to nip it in the bud fast. We\u2019re the blue collar workers of Genomics [she says, laughing]. We\u2019ll collect all those samples and sure\u2026 we send the residuals off to labs and research facilities. There\u2019s a market for anything with meta DNA or properties. Doing what we do safely, though? That costs money, and it doesn\u2019t pay to take shortcuts.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Many metahumans consider that a breach of their privacy.<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Oh, you bet. Some even get in our faces about it, try to sue us, but the court\u2019s on our side.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>The 2013 ruling by the Supreme Court determined that DNA couldn\u2019t be patented.<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>DNA in its natural form, sure, but let\u2019s face it\u2026 metas aren\u2019t a natural occurrence. Their mutations can\u2019t be charted or predicted. What they do doesn\u2019t happen in nature. That falls outside of the Supreme Court\u2019s ruling and makes their genes open to research and trademarking.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>For now.<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>For now and a long time, hun.\u00a0Besides, with the samples we provide, it\u2019s barely enough to whet the appetites of biopharma. If they see something interesting with the samples we send them, they\u2019ll contact the metas directly and pay them really well for more genetic samples. It\u2019s a win across the board.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Have metahumans taken them up on that offer?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Yes, but I couldn\u2019t say who. And I mean, really. I couldn\u2019t. Lawyers and all that. But\u2026 weren\u2019t you here to talk about me?<\/p>\n HERO BEAT:<\/strong> So how did you get the idea to start Roadkill Inc.?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Watching Ghostbusters<\/em>. No, cross my heart, I’m serious. After that scene in the grand ballroom when they zap Slimmer and the entire place is trashed, I started wondering who handles all the residual left behind. I\u2019m not talking cleaning up the smashed plates or the tables or anything. I mean the supernatural goop and the radiation left from the proton accelerators. Then I started wondering what happened to the cleaning staff? Would they get cancer? Or get sick because they touched all that slime?<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Who you gonna call?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Us, right? [She laughs] At first, we were in the disposal business with one van, but then we started getting pinged by biopharma and metallurgy companies, asking to buy anything unusual we found.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Unusual?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Anything with genetic information, but I mean, look at what metas can do with metals and substances\u2026 it\u2019s incredible. The way they rearrange crystalline structures to play with things creates metals with unique properties. Here\u2026 take someone like Chain-Spider. We cleaned up after that fight with Atom-Slayer and sent her broken chains to our client. Turns out, they were made from some kind of bone with a micro-weave of metal, but you take normal bone, right? It\u2019s five times stronger than steel at the same weight. Chain-Spider\u2019s chains were still lighter and just as strong if not stronger. If she\u2019d taken up an offer to donate more links, we could have had a lighter, stronger organic metal that could regrow right now. How terrific would that be?<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>She refused your client?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>She vanished. After her accident? But that\u2019s my point. Isn\u2019t it a meta\u2019s responsibility to make the world a better place. Well, what if their bone marrow turned out to be a universal donor for Leukemia patients? What if their skin cells could help burn victims? But no… they’re more worried about fame or protecting their identity than getting checked out by the labs.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>So you\u2019re holding metas accountable by selling their genetic material?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>You\u2019re saying that, hun, not me. And I\u2019m not selling anything they didn\u2019t leave behind. You don\u2019t want me using your residuals, then clean up your mess. It\u2019s what I tell my son. Clean up the mess you made. It\u2019s that simple. Metas are just miffed they didn\u2019t think of it first, but we\u2019re still generous. There\u2019s a couple of metas out there sitting on millions because we put them on the radar of biopharma.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Is there really that kind of cash out there?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Sure, it depends, but yeah, if you\u2019ve got the noggin for it. Take a look at Henrietta Lacks\u2026 the poor woman responsible for the HeLa line of immortal cells. Without the cancer cells that killed her, we never would have found a vaccine for Polio or conducted all that AIDS and cancer research, or discovered the effects of radiation. Her cell samples created an entire industry. And she was one of us, human.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Most metas would take offense at not being referred to as \u2018humans.\u2019<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Humans don\u2019t poop things that glow in the dark. Do you know how many times the Department of Sanitation or Department of Environment Protection had called us because they found \u201csomething\u201d in the sewers or canals that puts their workers at risk? They have us on speed dial. We already call them \u201cmetahuman.\u201d That means beyond human\u2026 so why are they upset if I call us humans and them metas? I tell you, people are just too damn sensitive.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Have you ever caught flack for Roadkill Inc.?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Oh sure, you bet. \u2018You\u2019re being insensitive, showing up someplace where people got hurt with that name\u2019 blah blah blah blah blah! Listen, hun, I\u2019m not in the business of holding anyone\u2019s hand. We\u2019re not in this for grief counseling. We\u2019re not there to put a bandaid on your knee. We\u2019re here to run a business, and I\u2019m sorry for what happened to you, but please–get off your high horses and stop pretending that everyone has to cry for you.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Has any metahuman ever come after you for something you collected?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Yessir, they have. We have a couple of metas on staff who can put a stop to that.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>Like Brownout. She suppresses powers?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Oh, she\u2019s a gem. She can stop any misunderstanding before it starts. And she\u2019s great for neutralizing problematic residuals.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>But not all the time, right? You lost someone last year to a residual?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Poor Hank, yes we did, but that wasn\u2019t on Brownout. We were helping the NYPD with a patch of this\u2026 tar-like droplets that they found at a murder? Well, those droplets got real agitated the minute we tried to scan them, and quick as a bullet, they shot into Hank, who was holding portable spectrograph. It was horrible, the way it dug into him.<\/p>\n HERO BEAT: <\/strong>This was the murder investigation of Nano-Gen\u2019s CTO, correct? Gordon Oliver?<\/p>\n BARTLET: <\/strong>Mm-hmm. It\u2019s still under investigation, but whatever killed dear Hank also killed Gordon Oliver and his assistant. Like I said\u2026 it\u2019s a dangerous job already. We\u2019re just the most qualified to handle it, and the city knows it. That\u2019s why we\u2019ll continue to be there whenever metas fight, cleaning up the mess so there\u2019s no further damage or loss of life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" You\u2019ve probably seen their white and yellow vans driving around Manhattan following a metahuman \u2018incident.\u2019 That\u2019s the industry\u2019s polite term for when metahumans get involved in something messy. Roadkill Inc. isn\u2019t a name that inspires confidence, Donna Bartlet will be […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6OdZi-4E","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":402,"url":"http:\/\/mozaikcomics.com\/HeroesWithoutBorders\/blog\/2016\/05\/05\/hero-beat-street-angels-network-part-i\/","url_meta":{"origin":288,"position":0},"title":"HERO BEAT: STREET ANGELS NETWORK PART I","author":"Lucien","date":"May 5, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"When you first become a crime fighter, there's a lot you don't know. 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